Sir, a third assassin has failed
“Huh I wonder why so many people keep trying to kill this guy. Better not change anything at all.” - politicans probably
“Huh I wonder why so many people keep trying to kill this guy. Better not change anything at all.”
He came forward with the truth about windmills and big renewable said axe this guy.
it’s a scheme by
Big Wind
“Huh I wonder why so many people keep trying to kill this guy. Better
not change anything at allalign our platform closer to his.” -politicansdemocrats probablyCan’t wait for election season in 2028 where it’s just libs and chuds taking pot shots at their preferred flavor of fascist.
I love that he can’t go out in public without the donkey of the week trying to shoot him. It’s even better than an Oswald doing it competently.
It would be funny if chuds get mad that people are trying to kill Trump and start trying to assassinate kamala
It’s hard for me to predict the dumbest timeline. This has become such a pattern with Trump that I think there could be a genuine Stupid John Wick situation where goobers endlessly sacrifice themselves to prove to no one that they aren’t like the last goober. He’ll just be a donkey magnet until he dies of natural causes at the age of 120.
until he dies of natural causes at the age of 120.
He’ll be a formless blob of cortisol and hair medication by then, like the ending of
He’s already like 87% of the way there
It is kinda weird no one has attempted it yet
Obama and Biden also never had any assassination attempts against them (that were made public, anyway). It’s strange.
hitting the dice roller again and again in baldur’s gate 3 and just coming up with 1 every time
No quick-load for these folks
I actually started laughing when I saw the headline.
on trillbillies they called it “always something with this guy”
on trillbillies they called it “always something with this guy”, i recall that phrase a lot with trump news lately
Can you not get shot at…FOR FIVE MINUTES?!
I have laughed every time
The suspect, identified as Vem Miller
Not a real name
Bianco said Miller considers himself a so-called sovereign citizen, a group of people who do not believe they are subject to any government statutes unless they consent to them. Bianco said Miller’s identity card was enough to raise suspicion with local rally security. “They were different enough to cause the deputies alarm,”
Not a real country, stg. Did he print it on fucking inkjet printer without golden thread or whatever they believe
Bianco also said the FBI is questioning another man after bomb-detecting dogs “repeatedly” identified him as possibly dangerous. That man was not allowed in the rally, Bianco said.
Cant have shit in usa
First a blackpilled groyper who just wanted to be famous and also die, then a NAFO freak, now a sovereign citizen? It’s like he’s going for a niche reactionary white guy BINGO. What’s the next one gonna be? An extremely divorced guy whose personality is filming himself going on racist rants while driving around in his truck? An Evangelical wearing Chick Tracts like a Warhammer character wears scraps of scripture?
4chan weeb who tries to do it with a katana and throwing stars
Ok but imagine if they were the one to succeed lmao
making Jojo references as theyre shot by secret service
4.8 miliseconds later
I REJECT MY HUMANITY DONALD
We will also accept Naruto-running away from the Secret Service.
The elusive hacker known as 4chan, strikes yet again.
Jet-ski dealer who escaped prison after being arrested over 6th january
shenaniganscoup attempt
Oh fuck my money is on this one
White guy who’s a black hebrew israelite
Getting revenge after his mother wasted all of their savings on the Trump NFTs.
This would be the funniest.
An Evangelical wearing Chick Tracts like a Warhammer character wears scraps of scripture
babe wake up, new “world’s best cosplay idea” just dropped
Dim Wizard
This comes close to topping all my best kelly jokes
halloween is coming soon!!
guy who thinks that trump won the 2020 election and has been shadow governing ever since and that this asshole running in 2024 is obviously a CIA body double since trump would not be constitutionally allowed to have a third term
That’s Hillary in a Donald Trump fursuit, I can tell by how dry he’s looking!Wokemon go to the polls
I’m curious as to whether or not someone’s gonna end up taking shots at him for simply not really lining up with the version of him they carry in their head.
CIA just using all their activation phrases, all at once
extremely divorced guy whose personality is filming himself
omg
and with a go-pro, please 🙏
Some “Grey Tribe Rationalist” techbro that thinks he is invincible because of “quantum immortality” and expects to load-save into the next multiverse over where he wasn’t mag dumped upon
First a blackpilled groyper who just wanted to be famous and also die, then a NAFO freak, now a sovereign citizen? It’s like he’s going for a niche reactionary white guy BINGO.
According to chud newspapers, all three were radical leftist Marxists. All those frothing right wing gunmen never ever shoot at anyone, really.
maybe obama is right that he is like castro
The suspect, identified as Vem MillerNot a real name
Short for Vemhinkular Mailmslaughller
the deep state aren’t sending their best, folks
isn’t this the fourth one?
- Pennsylvania dude who was killed
- Florida dude who hid in the bushes
- Michigan dude strutting around talking about his (imaginary) C4
or does Mr Michigan not actually count for some reason I missed hearing about?
He’s gonna match Castro for number of attempted assassinations if he keeps it up.
First as farce second as tragedy.
Maybe they should try an exploding mcchicken next.
Lol guess I’m losing count
Well, he needs to be lucky every time.
Something something only need to get lucky once
Just a shame Maggie got lucky every time.
88 years…
This has to be a psyop. It can’t be that hard.
What’s the ETA on Freedom of Information Act requests? Can we ask for files yet about the GOP using its stooges to try and eliminate Trump because they want to run Joe Biden in his place?
Right? Lmao
hexbears I know it’s tempting but it’s not worth it to prove that hexbear was right once again
Yeah, I about posed some [redacted] before I thought better of it.
i gues the third time is uhhh …not the charm?
ah well, neverthelessFucking stole my line. Maybe the third person who actually gets a shot out is the charm
Ah, well, nevertheless
The suspect later told US media that he was a Trump supporter who bought the guns for his own safety and notified police at a checkpoint that they were in the trunk of his car. “These accusations are complete bullshit,” Miller said. “I’m an artist, I’m the last person that would cause any violence and harm to anybody.”
Yeah, there aren’t any infamous examples of Right-wing artists using violence to harm people.
“I’m an artist, I’m the last person that would cause any violence and harm to anybody.”
the first doofus fucked it up for everyone, now security is too tight. sad
Fingers crossed, it’s not Drumpf’s time to die yet.
Let him win, and let him get up on stage and start talking about avoiding WW3 and the need to impose 100%+ tariffs on all countries that move away from the dollar, and then let him get JFKed on live tv
If trump gets assassinated after getting elected that would be the worst of all possible outcomes. The US would go turbofascist in seconds.
Depends on who the people blame, but maybe.
The maga dipshits would blame the left and the libs would jump right in with them, doing some reconciliation shit all the way to the new Auschwitz.
If he hadnt tried, none of these guys would have attempted it either
Commiefornia once again trampling on the 2nd amendment 😒
