Isn’t the entire point of the profile and matching system to filter incompatible people out? Why can I match with 50 people and not a single one wants to get a coffee or something after exchanging a few pleasantries? Everybody hates these things and yet they refuse to do anything IRL to get off them. Is there some Manchurian candidate activation codeword that I’m missing? I feel like everyone treats this shit solely as an ego booster and actually gets pissed off that anyone tries to interact with them. How do you meet people in hellworld if you don’t drink?

Me after dozens of dead-end back-and-forths that lead to nowhere despite having shared interests and presumably being attracted to each other since we matched: marx-joker

Hmm, maybe it’s the extreme commodification of relationships and atomization under capitalism that prevents you from getting anywhere with this garbage thinkin-lenin

Nope, must be because @[email protected] didn’t say my favorite “The Office” quote and send me a playlist with 50 of the greatest songs I’ve never heard that made me instantly fall in love with them. I have no idea what other people expect from these things but I’m not doing labor for someone that I don’t even know is real. Thanks for reading my rant, any advice is appreciated.

  • Bassword@hexbear.netEnglish
    4·
    1 year ago

    Their response to ‘I have no passions’ was basically ‘then find some by exposure’. I think it’s fair advice to people who think you need to follow a “calling” or something before you do something new. In my experience, I found passions through doing things, rather than doing things I was already passionate about, because like OP I didn’t have any to start with. Probably not universal advice but it worked for me.

    I guess more practically my advice would be to never say no to offers to do something (within fair limits obviously). No matter how much something sounds unfun or you’re not in the mood, if someone invites you, go and try it once. I’ve had some very good and very bad experiences doing this, but all were valuable.

    • UlyssesT [he/him]@hexbear.netEnglish
      1·
      1 year ago

      I think it’s fair advice

      “Git gud” doesn’t encourage the discouraged. There are more successful methods, though many of them require at least a little bit of personal rapport and trust first, which doesn’t really land with “git gud” statements. They may feel good to say but they’re not likely to actually help that person.

        • UlyssesT [he/him]@hexbear.netEnglish
          1·
          1 year ago

          Yeah though? Some hobbies might have a high cost of entry, but a lot you can start for basically nothing. You’ve just gotta fire that cannon until you hit something that works.

          That’s “git gud” to me, and probably for the discouraged person that read it.