Smurf-ass motherfuckers. You’re not even real cops but you still wear that dumbass badge. Guess this is where all the academy dropouts ended up at. I see you taking your own backpacks straight past the checkpoints you fucking hypocrites. You couldn’t catch a bomb if it landed right on top of you you fucking fucks AAAAAAAAA!!! 
My butter knife could be used to take control of the plane? Holy fuck are you fucking listening to yourself? That’s literally my fucking job! Fuck you! And they give fucking butter knives to the business class passengers on the fucking plane, holy fucking shit!!! 
Don’t tell me I’ve been fucking randomed, I can see the green cleared icon reflected in your glasses you lying sack of shit, fuck you! 
No interest in experiencing this so will probably never visit the US. My friends who were born there have very weird stories about the TSA questioning why they live abroad whenever they visit. It’s as if they pick people who believe the US is the only country worth living in to work at an airport of all places.
You won’t just get a butter knife in business class either, you’ll get ones suitable for steak and thick braised meat dishes, which is even more hilarious.
From what I understand I think they’re trained to ask these types of questions in their rent-a-cop class and look for inconsistencies in your body language or whatever.
Of course it’s all bullshit but its main purpose is to make the smurfs feel very important, as evidenced by the smug asshole tone they always have.
Edit: Also I got interrogated on the butter knife while I was flying as a crew member in uniform. I don’t need shit to take control of the plane, and I have access to a fire axe.