I don’t talk about politics or religion at the workplace, yet there is a drama queen that loves just blurting out what she thinks to everyone around.
My way to go so far has been to ignore her, but sometimes I just want to yell at her how incoherent she is.
Then I’d be the one starting drama I guess…
I’m looking for advice to deal with these kind of people. I don’t want to work listening to conspiracy theories.
You have basic human social cues and a the minimal amount of empathy. So you won’t be able to ignore a person. As mush as people say it you can’t actually ignore people. The best you can do is minimize interactions.
Try to understand that people like this are desperate and crave interaction. I want someone to validate them. This can come by agreement or by argument. Either of those options will fuel them. People like this are unwell, though appear functional.
If you confront this person they will know they have a ‘live one’ and will NEVER EVER LET YOU GO. Do not engage unless you deliberately want to give them the interaction they are so desperate for.
Give non-responses, grunts, etc to them . Stuff like ‘huh, must have a lot of time on your hands’ ‘ok’ ‘huh’ Keep body language to a minimum. Like others have said this is for all topics. Even a small smile on a point of agreement is a small crumb of the interaction they are desperate for.
Headphones all the time.
Quit. You will know your workplace and know if they given any care at all about a professional environment. Most ‘HR’ departments or managers are simply not equipped to deal with a drama person who doesn’t cross the line to blatantly illegal. If you are in the unicorn place that cares and is willing to shut down a person like this speak to a manager or HR. If you don’t work in that place, time to move. This isn’t advice for everyone. You are bothered enough to want to engage with this person. It’s obviously on some level effecting you. Over more time it may not get better.
Many, if not most large companies and government agencies have workplace harassment policies. If you find out what you’re covered by, and make your views known, the behavior of this individual could be reportable.
It’s a long road, but
You grow up.
I would do the following.
- Politely ask her to refrain from talking about politics at work as it makes you uncomfortable.
- If #1 fails, go to your supervisor/manager and put in a formal complaint.
- If #2 isn’t handled discreetly or is simply ignored, go to your superior’s boss and repeat the action of step #2.
- If #3 fails, go to HR.
- If #4 fails or there is no HR to go to, seek new employment elsewhere, and write a review of company on Glassdoor.
Politics is group decision making. Religion is humanities relation to the supernatural. Drama, in context, seems to be a flaring of emotions.
Politics is unavoidable. Working with others requires decision making. She is telling you how she goes about making decisions i.e. deferring to authority.
Religion is also unavoidable since it informs politics. Many people believe God-King Jesus will come fix all the world’s problems. Thereby they are primed for deferring to authority.
Drama is a result of the multiplayer game of conversation. You can control your inputs and responses. You can control your internal state. There is no shame leaving a game instead of grinding to “git gud”. Not every game is for everyone. I enjoy the grind.
She is telling you how she goes about making decisions i.e. deferring to authority.
This is really insightful. Thanks.
Well, i mean, based on context, she’s probably dumb, and the opinions match her lack of social grace. There’s that quote about not letting morons drag you down to their level, where they can beat you with experience. You need to work on you selective deafness, or, start using her bullshit for your own amusement. Agree with her in a real backhanded way she’s not sure of, English style.
I don’t talk about politics or religion
The entirety of polite, modern society lives by this rule
How the actual fuck do Americans just not get it? 😂
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Politicians have made everything political by inserting themselves as a way to get people to stop talking about a subject as a easy way form themselves to stay relevant, as well as controlling the message to their favor.
☝️This is also the exceptionalism where they don’t realise every western country is like this lol
Let them.
Have you tried weed?
I do, wouldn’t help, try mush.
Someone already mentioned going to HR or talking to your boss, but if you really want to shut it down just call her out on her bullshit. Make her explain her position and ask followup questions until she can’t respond. She’s just parroting some talking head, and you can even make a game out of trying to figure out which one she’s channeling
I don’t think you should be quiet, it makes them feel like everyone is agreeing with them and makes everyone miserable. Time to introduce you to my favorite game to play with conservatives, Politics Judo!
So you hear them rant about a thing. Some dumbass talking point. Let’s use gun control. It’s pretty easy to know in advance what the talking points are since they never shut up and parrot the same problem and solution over and over. “Shouldn’t take guns, it’s a mental problem not a gun problem”.
Things are basically boiled down to a problem and a solution. A lot of people try to convince people that the problem isn’t what people think it is, and that’s hard to do. Even if they are just misinformed, it feels like trying to dismiss their fears.
So what you do is you agree with the problem, then use lefty talking points as the solution.
“Oh yeah, gun violence is pretty bad! And I love the Constitution, we shouldn’t mess with that!” (Use small words and also throw in some patriotism, makes them feel like you’re on their side. You want to sound like a right wing media con artist) “so instead of taking guns away, we should instead start having more, free, mental health care in this country. Since it’s a mental health problem and these people are crazy, that is the solution that makes the most sense!” (Don’t try to get them to agree to your solution, just state it as the obvious one)
It becomes weaponized cognitive dissonance. Their brains fry because you said the things you should to agree with them, flagged yourself as an ally, but then said the thing they were told is the bad and shouldn’t want.
If they try to argue with your solution, rinse and repeat to a different talking point. “Oh yeah it might cost more, and we shouldn’t have to pay more for it, so we should get the rich people who are screwing average hard working Americans over by not paying taxes to do that. We should shut down tax loopholes and increase funding to the IRS so they can go after them instead of the little guy”
Always sound like you’re agreeing with them, but giving solutions that they disagree with that seem to be off topic but are related.
Either they will get flustered and stop, or they will slip up and say something racist or sexist or something, and then you can have HR bust them. Document it and also see if you’re in a single party consent state.
I love how you immediately pegged her politics, without any actual indication where on the spectrum she was. You, in your fictional scenario, actually repeated a common one among 2nd amendment die hards, mental health services not confiscations.
I do something similar but yours is more comprehensive and elaborate.
Thank you for your response.
I work 100% remote, which has made it very easy for me to ignore my coworkers’ bad politics takes because they’re confined to a specific Slack channel
Reply to them in a “really? Aren’t you just adorable” tone of voice. Don’t engage with what they’re saying but treat them way you would treat a puppy that has just learned not to crap on the rug. Or a mental patient.
“Trump says he’s going to fix everything two weeks after he takes office!”
“Really? That’s amazing! Here I was thinking that you hadn’t thought this through, when clearly you had.”
Honestly, just tell her you’d rather not talk about politics. It can be incredibly passive. You do not need to elaborate. You can make up something simple like “I just want to focus on work while I’m at work,” it doesn’t even need to make sense. If she pushes back, drop it, but don’t ever say it’s okay for her to do. Then if she keeps doing it talk to your manager about it. “I’ve talked to her and asked her not to talk about politics, but she insists. I find it distracting.” Again, it doesn’t necessarily need to make sense and it doesn’t need to be over the top. Now,. hopefully your manager will sort it out. Because if it’s annoying you it’s likely annoying others.
This is probably the best and most realistic answer here. Just tell them that you’re here to work and not chitchat. I’ve done a similar thing when asked why I don’t take a break so we (my superior and I) could go on break together. I work less than 6 hours so I’m not legally required to go on a 30 minute break.
Smh at a few of those other comments that read more like someone trying to write bad fanfiction.
I straight up called a coworker, in public, a brainless idiot for falling for right wing propaganda and then spent the next half hour mocking his views.
He never spoke about them again.
Wish this would work, it wouldn’t. When your company is 95% on the opposite side of your views, you just become the crazy person. The whispers begin, then the group jabs, then the outcast etc etc. You know you’re the sane one, but that’s not how the majority thinks of you.
Changing jobs is always an option.
I can never seem to articulate what I think, so talking politics is very difficult to me. I would love to be able to mock someone’s brain dead political views for 5 minutes. 30 seems inconceivable. Good on ya!
Right, I’m very conclusion oriented. So while I might know that I did validly get to a certain view or conclusion, I don’t always know well enough why to the point I can explain it to others or argue with someone about it.
This can even be something as simple as why I chose one product over the other. I know I had good reasons for choosing the laptop I did when I bought it, but if you ask me what specifically about it made me choose it over another I probably can’t tell you.
Wow, such smart, much progressive! No brainless idiot at all!
I’m not sure what your plan was with this comment but if it was anything other than to showcase your room temperature IQ, it didn’t succeed.
IMO you just came across as an arrogant jerk with your comment, who might as well be the type of “drama queen” OP was talking about. Somehow if you hold “the right” political views, it makes it ok.
The reason people find it ok to tell a right wing cunt to shut up is because usually you have to be a massive donkey or a proper cunt to believe it’s ok to make other people’s lives difficult just because they are different.
People who are able to think for longer than 5 seconds in a row without requiring immediate medical assistance tend to see through the constant distractions, bullshit and lies of the right wing.
Now piddle off.
You might as well be a donkey to believe in right wing propaganda, but you have to be a pathetic spiteful jerk to be so angry at everyone holding different views. Because in your system there can be no different views, only the “correct” propaganda, which you believe in as god’s honest truth. Did you also cry and had to take a day off when Trump won? The problem with libs is - they tend to wish reality into existence. “I think it’s true, so it must be”. “Everyone disagreeing with me is a fascist cunt and must be exterminated, or worse, cancelled”.
“Look at the polls, people are tired of your bullshit. - No, it can’t be, it’s all Russian / Chinese propaganda”
“Your present is brain-dead and his successor can’t sit through a real interview for more than 5 minutes” - “I will still support him, and then be devastated when they horribly lose”
“Mr President and his son are part of a corruption scheme in another country” - “This is ridiculous”, “OK, might be actually true”, “B-b-but what about Trump!”
I was once holding the same views, hated everyone else and believed in every word they said. I was really disappointed when it started showing through the cracks. Not because they lie (because, apparently, everyone does), but because they were always on their high horse and always sowing panic.
but you have to be a pathetic spiteful jerk to be so angry at everyone holding different views.
Yes because right wing cunts are known for being extremely tolerant of others. We’re not talking about ‘different views’. We’re talking about harmful views. People who think it’s ok to make people miserable just because they’re different. So fuck off.
“Everyone disagreeing with me is a fascist cunt and must be exterminated, or worse, cancelled”
Considering I largely disagree with fascists, if you disagree with me then there’s a solid chance you’re a fascist, yes.
And there’s a known cure for fascism.
Did you also cry and had to take a day off when Trump won?
I’m not american, but I guarantee you that if the right wing won in my country, I would need far more than a day off, not to cry, but to set shit on fire. Americans are weak people.
Fuck off, nazi sympathiser.
