I heard sending all the blood to your penis gives you limited, temporary relief.

That’s insane what you just said. I gag at the very thought of a left Twix.

Bold of you to assume there was a call at all.

Fuck yeah! Any other Driveshaft fans out there!?

Wait, it’s all hashtags?

I beg thy pardon.

when you can sit still, but you’re a fucking plant

Of course you are welcome to be annoyed by whatever you want but I think I kind of agree with this design… Regardless of what state the car is in, you always know that if you push that button, the car should now be in park. If you’re a dum dum like most of us, and you forget whether you’ve done it already or not, you don’t need to check the dash or anything to decide whether to push it or not, you can just do it. It’s like saving twice in a Pokemon game. I like that it’s two distinct gestures, but compressed down into one mechanism.

However, I’m not sure I like that it’s push to engage and pull to disengage. In my car I’m pretty sure it’s pull to engage and push to disengage, which reminds me of the old lever style of parking brake.

Supposably gets me. I’m also unnecessarily annoyed by “besides the point” and “anyways”.

So she’s only threatened her schools illegally?

As you can see from the data: as Everybody increases, so too does Sucks.

A similar trend can be seen here: on the X axis we track Everything, and on the Y axis a pronounced increase in Fucked is revealed.

I’ll show me!

Politics is so team sports, they even think performance enhancing drugs are a bad idea.

Does it trouble you at all that the diagram doesn’t specify where the wall should be?

He’s obviously built himself thousands of little elevators over millenia. What did you guys think he was doing down there? Sleeping?

That’s a real shame. Swiss rolls are non-negotiable.

“SLAMS”

Damnit, I was pretty sure the one on the right was Goofy.

We live in a world where I read “high schoolers” and my brain autocorrected it to “high school shooters”.

Just “hold it in” on the second floor of the hotel. The conference floor.