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Joined 2 years ago
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Cake day: June 18th, 2023

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  • Reminds me of a joke somewhere.

    One day the Queen* comes to visit a hospital. During the tour, she glances into one of the rooms and sees a man masturbating. Shocked, she asks the nurses that tour her around “What in heaven’s name is that‽”
    The nurse quickly guides her away and replies “That patient has a condition where he needs to ejeaculate regularly, and when you’ve gotta, you’ve gotta. He’s been given a private room to not bother the other patients.”

    Some time later they walk by another room, where there’s a patient receiving oral stimulation from an attractive nurse. Shocked, she looks at the nurses who tour her around and asks “What the- what is going on in here‽”
    The nurse answers: “same condition as the other guy, better insurance.”

    * replace for whatever head of state or high ranking official you’d like.


  • Let’s see. One of my campaigns we have:

    • A Dhampir Paladin whose surname is Van Helsing, who fights enemies by trying to suck their blood
    • A Death domain Cleric, who’s OOC made it very clear that they’re gonna go into necromancy
    • An Eldritch Knight fighter
    • A Firbolg druid with 1 level in Rogue who took that level so she has access to weapon mastery (we started at level 4)
    • Me, a Battle Master fighter.

    I swear, I think I’m gonna prep a Drow Assassin Rogue as a backup character.

    (NINJA) EDIT: Y’know, I’m gonna prep the sheet already, just in case.