Yes. I’ve got nothing and I’m resigned to the fact I’ll never have anything. After years of cancer treatment that caused me to have a stroke, which has left me partially sighted and unable to walk properly, I was no longer able to work or study, and now spend my life going through endless disability benefit claims and appeals (because they reassess me stupidly frequently), scavenging for food and on the brink of homelessness while going through these appeals. Due to my illness I lost any chance of a normal life, no career, no family. I consider myself ace but I could still have had a family of my own. Now due to my health it’s too late. I can barely look after myself anyway. My friends all drifted away as my illness wore on and I was no longer able to go out much, so I have absolutely no social life whatsoever. Due to lack of funds I can’t even do simple things like rent films I want to see on amazon. I’ve accepted that my life is pointless, meaningless and miserable. But why does the government have to make it worse with these endless benefit assessments? The constant poverty is the one thing I can’t accept. I’m just eaten up with anxiety about it all the time.
The only way I get through life is living in a fantasy world most of the time. I’ve built up this elaborate fantasy life in my head where I’m healthy and happy, surrounded by friends and having a great time with no financial worries. In these daydreams I go surfing and skydiving, have the best mates ever and am full of joy and life, everything is always sunny and I’m always young. The only way I can cope with reality is by imagining it away.

Some people definitely believe this stuff. I used to know someone who really believed this kind of thing. He had some type of undiagnosed mental illness and as well as believing things like this, he believed that everyone he knew was being paid by the government to stalk and harass him.

Also real coward behavior by the guy here to to face away from the male model

Maybe he’s hoping something slips up his back passage.

How long would it take to walk?

I went to the doctor complaining of awful fatigue. They refused to do any tests and diagnosed me with depression. When antidepressants made no difference, they diagnosed me with ME and sent me on my way with no help. I suffered like this for three and a half years and my life fell apart. It actually turned out to be thyroid cancer. So whenever someone gets diagnosed with ME now i always wonder if they actually have an underlying jealth issue but their doctors were just too lazy to look for it.

I’ve always wanted to visit Australia… but the spiders. Nope. just nope.

What’s the opposite of “comrade?”

Thanks, I don’t know what I would do without this place.

I certainly do feel I’ve experienced a huge amount of medical malpractice but I simply don’t have the energy or strength to do anything about it. The thought of taking on a ;egal case or something that would probably drag on for years is too much. It’s hard enough keeping up with the benefit appeal.

Thanks but I feel bad about using it again when so many others are there needing help. Also I’m worried people might get compassion fatigue from me if I use it too often. I am pretty desperate though, I don’t know. How often do you think is OK?
The NHS has let me down even worse than that - it took them three and a half years to diagnose my cancer. They refused to do any tests initially, saying I was “too young for it to be anything serious.” They diagnosed me with depression and gave me antidepressants. When that didn’t work they said I was a hypochondriac. Meanwhile I was slowly dying of cancer. Also when I was finally diagnosed they said the recommended treatment didn’t have any side effects. Then when I had a stroke and developed heart problems they were like “Oh yeah those are side effects of your meds.”

I’m an older millennial. My experience might not be typical since it was caused by serious illness as well as capitalism. When I was young I was idealistic and wanted to make the world a better place. I wanted to fight for human equality and animal rights, I really thought this is what I came to earth for. I worked a few different jobs, donating a chunk of my paychecks to causes I care about while trying to find out how to get more involved.

But then I got cancer, and the treatment caused me to have a stroke, which left me partially sighted and learning to walk again. I’m still in cancer treatment, it makes me exhausted and brain foggy, and I’ve developed chronic, severe migraines. But what makes this a million times worse is the UK benefit system. I can’t work any longer and had to sign on for disability benefits. They re-assess me frequently, and make me go through MRs and appeals. Last time I provided letters of support from my GP, physiotherapist, ophthalmologist and mental health team (because I’ve developed depression and anxiety from this constant stress, it got so bad I made a suicide attempt and am now in therapy). I also provided letters of support from a carer and social worker. Somehow at my last assessment I was awarded zero points. Now I’m going through appeal. My overdraft is maxxed out, I have no money, just debt.

This means my entire life now revolves around desperately trying to stay fed, while being extremely unwell and undergoing regular horrible medical treatments. My entire mental and physical energy are taken up with trying to find food, desperately trying to access food banks (difficult and time consuming), fight my appeal. I’ve taken to outright begging and shoplifting. I’ve been stealing food items from the local supermarket, one day in desperation I even sat in the street and asked passersby for spare change. I recently begged for money here on hexbear and a couple of kind souls gave me enough for some food. But every time someone charitable helps me get food, it of course always runs out and when it does it’s back to begging, shoplifting and starving. All for the crime of getting cancer.

You know what’s even more stupid? due to chronic starvation I developed multiple vitamin and mineral deficiencies, diagnosed by blood tests after I fainted in the street and someone called an ambulance. So now the NHS pays for me to have supplements. But the country won’t ensure me an income so I can buy food. How stupid is this! They won’t give me money, so I starve to the point I collapse and instead of doing the reasonable thing and ensuring I have food, they let me continue to starve but give me some vitamin pills. This worls is just absolutely sick.

So now I have no physical or mental energy to fight to make the world a better place. I feel completely hopeless, and like the world itself is hopeless because there are many people in an even worse situation than me. Millions, maybe billions. It’s all so overwhelming.