My favorite clean joke, what do call a ship on the ocean floor that twitches? A nervous wreck.

" I can’t fire my rifle! My hand is cramped up!"

Exactly! Same thing happened to a girl I used to know. She had two cactuses, put one on a window behind a curtain and forgot about it. The other, in full view, she kills it with her love. She finds the other thriving when she is packing up for a move.

To shreds, you say.

See, what people don’t realize, cactus thrive on neglect.

Wait? Is the cybertruck a shitty electric camino?

Edit: deleted second electric

This wouldn’t be half as funny if I wasn’t married.

Can you imagine if Nebraska Spiderman was more like a wolf spider? Just jumping out at MFs.

Black roof country, no gold pavements, tired starlings

Right? Throw in a “I have spine, but no arms or legs. Sometimes, I have dog ears.”

But is it as good as Cheddar Goblin™ brand maccaroni?

What about the donkey teeth?

https://youtu.be/3zDHSLDY0Q8?si=M1xO-xHCbKjFText

When you read this comic, does the spider have a masculine voice or a feminine voice? I feel like it changes the context a little.

Like anything, You have to pay extra for that…

Or maybe strapped to a tree in a forest full of hungry horny grizzly bears. Is that better?

Hello, fellow dog percussionists.

We call it a 3:45 ass…

https://youtu.be/JcGVXr4M8T0?si=CifxiW8eEel4A_Gt

You have to pay the troll toll to get into that’s boy’s hole soul.

https://youtu.be/cZiEAdpX3_o?si=BXjKCmQs8gW_iOja

This is one of my favorite stories, second only to the princess and the pee.

“I want to know what it feels like for someone to shit in my mouth, but I’m shy…”