• BudgetBandit@sh.itjust.works
      link
      fedilink
      arrow-up
      9
      arrow-down
      1
      ·
      6 days ago

      No. It’s the only way men can experience pregnancy contractions. At least I have, once, when doing a spicy challenge. I did win it, but about 6 hours later I got some rumbly in my tumbly, then, another 3 hours later, all broke loose. The only feeling I had was pain. My stomach hurt, my intestines hurt, my butthole hurt. My body pressed itself free from this spicyness. Over an hour of contractions and pain. I was sweating, I was crying. Every time I thought it was finally over, another contraction. The heat started. It felt cold at times, before becoming hot again. And what did I do this for? Well, I got a shirt I got too fat to wear. And I got to say the best pickup line in my life: I only got this because you’re even hotter than that.