• TopRamenBinLaden@sh.itjust.works
    link
    fedilink
    English
    arrow-up
    8
    arrow-down
    5
    ·
    4 months ago

    I understand that some women don’t want to be called female when they are not cisgendered.

    I just don’t understand why a cisgendered person would have a problem being referred to as such, unless they were unsure if they were cis, or were bothered by the topic of gender identity as a whole.

    If its the former, than I can understand, but if its the latter, then that’s a you problem, and I don’t care if you are offended being called cis.

    • PsychedSy@lemmy.dbzer0.com
      link
      fedilink
      English
      arrow-up
      8
      arrow-down
      2
      ·
      4 months ago

      I think it’s mostly about how it’s used, yeah? Nobody calls me cis in real life. 40+ years and it hasn’t come up. The only time I see it used is derogatively.

      I don’t mind - I have strong opinions about letting peeps vent, but I can see why others find it negative.

      • Dasus@lemmy.world
        link
        fedilink
        English
        arrow-up
        1
        arrow-down
        3
        ·
        4 months ago

        The only time I see it used is derogatively.

        Give a few examples, please.

    • CherenkovBlue
      link
      fedilink
      English
      arrow-up
      9
      arrow-down
      4
      ·
      4 months ago

      I don’t agree with the concept of gender. Therefore, I object to being referred to as “cis” or “trans”. I have a sexed body and a brain within it that does brain things.

      No, I don’t identify as agender either. That still is part of the concept of gender.

      Downvotes or deletion in 3…2…1…

      • grysbok@lemmy.sdf.org
        link
        fedilink
        English
        arrow-up
        4
        arrow-down
        2
        ·
        4 months ago

        Do you have pronouns folks should use when referring to you, or should folks just use your screen name?

        • TopRamenBinLaden@sh.itjust.works
          link
          fedilink
          English
          arrow-up
          2
          arrow-down
          4
          ·
          edit-2
          4 months ago

          Based off of their comment, if its not sarcastic, the only pronoun I could think of that doesn’t have any hint of gender or enbyism to it is, “it”.

            • TopRamenBinLaden@sh.itjust.works
              link
              fedilink
              English
              arrow-up
              2
              ·
              edit-2
              4 months ago

              I apologize for assuming. Some people do actually prefer ‘it’, though. Your comment reminded me of a friend I have, who rejects any consideration of gender whatsoever. My friend prefers ‘it’ as a general pronoun if you aren’t using their name, directly.

            • TopRamenBinLaden@sh.itjust.works
              link
              fedilink
              English
              arrow-up
              3
              arrow-down
              1
              ·
              edit-2
              4 months ago

              I know that “it” can sound bad if it’s not preferred, but I know some people that do actually prefer “it”. Most people would prefer “they”, but “they” still suggests some form of non-binaryism is what I was getting at. Some people want something even farther away from the concept.

              • ArcaneSlime@lemmy.dbzer0.com
                link
                fedilink
                English
                arrow-up
                4
                arrow-down
                1
                ·
                4 months ago

                Weeellll I hate to nitpick but “they” only has a nonbinary connotation because of the hype around the issue atm, but it has been used for a good long while to refer to people of unknown gender (or a plurality thereof). The best example I can come up with is think about electronic music, Major Lazer, are they a group? One dude? One woman? One of each? Two of one and one of another? Who knows what they are (shhh you could google it but ykwim). “They” is the natural choice in this instance, otherwise you’re just guessing.

                Also it does happen to fit in with the nonbinary crowd for much of the same reason, many of them want to appear androgynous or of unknown gender and so they basically use it on the same principle but it isn’t exclusive to them nor should it necessarily conjure up images of nonbinary people just because that’s currently the new use, it’s probable many people have been using it as I described and never even noticed because it was just ingrained, and we only notice it at the “new” application regarding a specific individual’s gender that we may perceive as “known” subconsciously.

            • grysbok@lemmy.sdf.org
              link
              fedilink
              English
              arrow-up
              2
              arrow-down
              1
              ·
              4 months ago

              Some people do use “it” as their pronouns. (I’ve been shopping for pronoun pins, there’s a market for “it” pronoun pins, but it isn’t one of the Big 3.)

        • CherenkovBlue
          link
          fedilink
          English
          arrow-up
          2
          arrow-down
          4
          ·
          4 months ago

          I use the pronoun that is appropriate for my sex.

    • ArcaneSlime@lemmy.dbzer0.com
      link
      fedilink
      English
      arrow-up
      5
      arrow-down
      1
      ·
      4 months ago

      The going line is that “female” is for animals, “woman” is for human women, and if you say “female” you’re an incel bigot who should die. They also often say “you’d never say ‘male’ to refer to men” but I actually do that all the time, to the degree now if I don’t want to be bullied unnecessarily I have to say things like “My male friends don’t care what I call them, but my fem- [backspace] woman friends are very particular about verbiage.”

      It’s weird, but what can ya do.

    • grysbok@lemmy.sdf.org
      link
      fedilink
      English
      arrow-up
      4
      arrow-down
      1
      ·
      4 months ago

      The problem I’ve seen with being called “female” is when a speaker uses “men” for one set of people and “female” for another, in the same context. It feels gross, like they don’t see women as fully human. It feels much less bleck when a speaker uses “male” and “female”.

    • WalrusDragonOnABike [they/them]@lemmy.today
      link
      fedilink
      English
      arrow-up
      2
      ·
      4 months ago

      Why would a trans woman have any more problem with being called female?

      Male/female have a usecase of being used to try to distance oneself from the subjects of your sentence and often used in more scientific or legalistic styles and can come off as dehumanizing as a result.

      • TopRamenBinLaden@sh.itjust.works
        link
        fedilink
        English
        arrow-up
        1
        ·
        edit-2
        4 months ago

        Ah, I see what you are saying. I understand the connotations of referring to someone as female directly, and I would never do so.

        There are times where female is more proper to use, such as in medical settings, or as a descriptor in certain settings, e.g. ‘female hygiene products’. Some trans males and enbys would still be bothered by seeing the word ‘female’ in the proper setting, too.

          • TopRamenBinLaden@sh.itjust.works
            link
            fedilink
            English
            arrow-up
            1
            ·
            edit-2
            4 months ago

            I know that. So you agree and idk what you are trying to add here. Hence why I said that they are bothered when they see the word ‘female’ on things like their medical paperwork, dead named IDs, products they have to use, etc.

            Just because they are males doesn’t mean the rest of the world automatically changes its pronouns for them, and its unfortunate they have to deal with that.